Are you kind to yourself?

It's sad how brutal we can be to ourselves. We are prompt to punish ourselves when we fail to meet our own expectations, often disregarding our needs. If we can be as compassionate and understanding with ourselves as we're with others, our lives will be much easier.

I'm not sure what it could mean to you to be self-compassionate, but for me could mean avoiding speaking negatively when I fail to complete certain tasks. I often sabotage myself by creating a to-do list that goes beyond my capacity, and then I speak negatively when I don't finish everything on the list. I tend to feel guilty for this, and I tell myself that I'm lazy or unproductive, a procrastinator, and often that isn't the case. Instead, I now take a step to view the bigger picture. What's going on during this specific season in my life that might be draining my energy. I look at other factors, such as time management, so I can be more effective and intentional when planning my days. Also, it helps me to take my mind off of what hasn't been done and focus on what has been done and celebrate myself for that.

It can also be challenging to practice self-forgiveness. Forgive yourself for the things you've done or for messing up. You might do it again because you're a human being, and that's okay. Stop trying to make yourself feel bad and put your energy towards the lesson you learned and how much you've grown from every experience. The point here isn't to guilt yourself into doing things but to provide yourself with space to understand and know what you need to get to where you want to be.

If you are someone who believes that those around you deserve your kindness, compassion and respect, I want to remind you that you owe yourself all of those things as well.